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Monday, May 30, 2005

Thought of the day :: so lost... so empty... u leaving hasnt really sank in... i so need u here with me YA KNOW?!?!

the toughest drive ever in my life.... is to send you to the Brisbane International Airport at 12pm this afternoon... although we said not to slp the nite before.. i couldnt take it much longer... this past month had been a hell month for me... so busy with everything... bringing you to places.. wait.. dun be mistaken... its been my pleasure to bring u ard and take u to places... i wish i could still do tt... i miss u so much my heart's aching so badly... its been onli 4 hours since u're gone and i wan u rite beside me.... URGH!! standing there so helpless.. watching u go pass the boarding gate... yet i cant do a single thing abt it... i wanna grab hold of u and not let u go... "u are my tough cookie u know..??" i know... but i jus couldnt hold back anymore... tough cookies er... cry too u know?? URGH!! its been such a blessing to have u come by and visit... i nv wanted this monday to come... DOWAN... i dun care if im throwing tantrum or wat... i jus dowan... dowan u to leave... URGH!!! DDDDDOOOOOOOWWWWWWAAAAANNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!! can anybody even hear me?? hear how i shouted DOWAN??? *pull my hair* nv would i tink tt i would be like this... it was SO FREAKING HARD TO LET U GO!! wait... not tt it should be easy... but jus like u said... im ur tough cookie... i should be tough in situations like this... BUT I SO BADLY WAN U TO BE BY MY SIDE ALWAYS TOO!! NOW!!! DUN CARE!!! come to think of it now... wat A BABY I AM!! if i can.. i woul dhave stomp my feet and make a hell of a scene at the airport... thats how badly i dowan u to go... now.. its back to reality... sch then examz... holidays doesnt seem tt nice-to-look-forward to anymore... nothing beats having u beside me lo... after sch tonite... i wont have u at home waiting for me to come back from sch anymore... *SOBZ!!!* URGH!!! AHHH!!! URGH!!! *pull my hair again* i have to compose myself... i cant do any work with a state of mind like this... i might jus lose myself to insanity again... can i jus slp my days away??? 15 days were a long period of time... but SIX more months to go?!?!? WAT THE HELL?!?!?! im sad.. and my heart's aching so badly... if this isnt the last week of sch... i would hv stayed at home and slp... this is so hard.... so difficult u know!!! URGH!!! AHHH!!! im actually crying in the computer lab... DAAMMMmmNnnN........ i need help... counsellor anybody???


 [lEfT oUr pRiNtZ__*__sIlLyGiRl] at 4:02 pm

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